How to get buzzed off your balls on cocoa powder

I've consumed chocolate for years (5 years). I drink it straight, without sugar or milk, like a manly man. I drink it like Montezuma the Awesome did when he ruled over Mexico.

I've never had more than 15 cups of hotness. But I can tell you what happens to the body when it turns a sexy beast after consuming the bean of darkness. It's like getting drunk on chocolate. Have you ever drunk a gallon of milk? You feel milk-drunk. But chocolate is different, oh yes...  It's like a beautiful concoction of getting horny and happy. One time I wondered if there was ecstasy pills in my cocoa. But no. It was just cocoa.

At 1 Cup:  You feel so relaxed
At 2 Cup:  You feel so smooth and warm.
At 3 Cup:  You are beginning to get excited at things
At 4 Cup:  You are beginning to More excited. Maybe you feel like running or jumping or humping.
At 5 Cup:  You obtain euphoria and extreme energy. Heart beats deep. Body is hot.
At 6 Cup:  You obtain insight and stare off into the distance: "Who am I?" You ask. "I am nothing but choco"
At 7 Cup:  You begin to vibrate.
At 8 Cup:  You begin to have ambitions in life. "I want to become an important person in life."
At 9 Cup:  Headaches begin. You are hungry.
At 10 Cup:You are now having fierce headaches.

That's a rough outline of what happens when you're on chocolate.
But keep in mind the thresholds:
3 Cups gets you buzzed
5 Cups gets you relatively motivated
7 Cups gets you very euphoric.
9 Cups makes you mental.

Some day I will try the 15 cups and supplement with Advil to bypass the so-called "Chocolate Headaches" which soon arise.